There is nothing like being recognized.

I came home after a moderately rough Monday to a letter from my little brother, and a surprise birthday package from my best friend. Both made me feel instantly recognized; they knew exactly what I needed, and that the things below make me feel most like myself in the best way.

New York Times sections wadded up to pack the box instead of styrofoam peanuts.

adorable little boy handwriting that says, in the opening line, "I miss you," and almost makes me cry like a baby.

a movie on DVD that looks incredible and worth staying up late for.

a coffee mug with a special saying and that's big enough to hold a LOT of coffee.

gifts wrapped in gorgeous elephant/Indian mehendi printed paper.

handmade garland to decorate my home office

so much love and care and fun and insight into me packed into a box and an envelope that I somehow feel like despite my insane schedule and that I still don't feel at home in this big wierd state and that the holidays are coming up which kind of freaks me out, that everything is still okay, and that I'm still me.

What Happens When I Grocery Shop Without a List

Cheez-its.

two cans of mandarin oranges.

being absolutely stumped on how to feed my husband and I during the last three weeks of classes.

lots of coffee and creamer.

brussels sprouts.

two slices of pancetta.

lots of raspberry lemonade.

popsicles.

a huge caramel latte from Starbucks to get me through the rest of the insane shopping trip.

stuff that makes me cringe

earrings.

thinking about wearing earrings.

those big gauge earrings. why? your ears will never be the same again.

super public wedding proposals.

Zumba.

leggings as pants. As in, without a top of any kind that covers, well, what should be covered.

when people say the way that other languages are spoken are "wrong."

bedazzled jeans.

pictures of myself in high school.

when other people stub their toes. ouch!

little girls wearing "teen" clothes in public.

how I always seem to over mix my muffin dough and they always come out rubbery.

Today

I am thankful for...

a husband who insists on making me confetti cake for my birthday by himself.

delicious confetti cake.

finally being caught up on the reading for one of my Lit classes.

a patient golf pro.

a crystal vase with candy canes in it. makes me feel sort of Christmas classy. not really.

ok, just thankful for candy canes.

birthday cards in the mail that make me feel special.

leftover lasagna for dinner. it's always better the next day.

sweet family with cute blogs that I can stalk because they have the cutest family and the best recipes; you know who you are. ;) so glad we're family.

my amazing mom who taught me, well, pretty much every piece of common sense and wisdom I have.

seeing my husband's sweet face light up when he surprises me with "Happy Birthday" banners decorating the kitchen. Knowing that making me happy makes him happy makes me happy... :)

Happy Almost New Year

Instead of waiting for New Year's Eve, I figure I should make my "New Years Resolutions" at my next birthday, since it will be the start of my next year of life. that's not for two days, but hey, no time like the present!

I will:

get out of bed the first time the alarm goes off.

actually get good pictures of Brian and me. instead of taking fuzzy ones with my crappy camera phone.

see all the beautiful museums in Balboa Park.

listen to bands/music I've never listened to before. instead of the same cds over and over and over.

get bangs. just bite the bullet and do it.

try one crafty thing. knitting. crocheting. something.

make homemade icecream.

Things I Wish I Liked

...But I Don't.

black coffee.

Sushi (I binged when we moved to the west coast and now I can't stand it.)

wearing headbands.

roses.

the constantly-pleasant California weather.

the way I look in skinny jeans.

red lipstick.

watching sports other than hockey.

ab workouts.

modern art.

fancy red wine.

maxi dresses on me. (other people look so great in them, I look like a mushroom.)

rice. quinoa. and anything with a rice-y texture.

I have been an even lazier blogger

... but that just means I have been less lazy in all the other aspects of my life. Here's what's up.

I'm a lit major. so I read. and write. a lot.

so much that there are NO books on my Christmas list because I know they will sit on my shelf and stare at me sadly while I read about Gothic cathedral blueprints, Spanish irregular imperfect verbs, American transcendentalists, and all manner of British literature. *sigh*

I complain a lot, but this is the most intellectually stimulated I've been in an long time. I love it.

I had reach to come up with things I want for Christmas. Why? Because... I'm really content. I don't want or need anything, really. It's good to be me.

I am done shopping for all of my and my husband's families birthdays (both in-laws, brother-in-law, and both my brothers all within about a month of each other.)

Am also completely done with Christmas shopping. My goal is to be done Christmas shopping by December first. So I can actually enjoy Christmas.

I went on about a month hiatus from cooking. Yeah. For real. and yes, I'm busy with school and whatnot. but really? I am making a stronger effort to fill up my fridge with real food, not just leftover boxed macaroni and cheese and a freezer full of popsicles.

I am turning 23 in less than a week. So until May, my husband and I will only be four years apart instead of five. And we are having home-made lasagna and confetti cake from a box. and I couldn't be more excited about it.